Sunday, March 14, 2010


She found her meaning and happiness in a polka dotted sea shell, while I searched for mine in the approaching waves of the ocean hoping they would spill me a secret. For her, an evening of enjoyment meant a couple of different flavored, cashew topped, king size ice creams, while I failed to find mine even in the most luxurious of homes surrounded by hordes of people. She found pride in the smallest of achievements - in catching a butterfly, flying a kite and in scaring the neighbour's son out of his wits. I couldn't find mine in numerous college degrees and the many bank accounts. Her world started at our doorstep ending near the main gate. For me, sky was the limit which so soon had started to seem so less.
She ran to him with careless abandon and flashing dimples as he entered through the door. She clung to her father who had just returned from work as if he were her long lost treasure. I wondered where I had lost my gift of reckless joyousness and free expression of love I was once loved for. I knew she had got it from me... and so did he. The dimples were his though. He looked at her like she was the most precious thing in the world. He got her a doll and a pretty pink frock. He always said I looked lovely in pink.
I waited. He never came back without something for me. This time, I got a kiss.. on my daughter's cheek.


Friday, March 12, 2010

I have learnt..

I have learnt to remember that silence is "almost always" the best answer
and to recognize the situations which dont belong to "the almost always"
I have learnt not to try to stop things which want to run
and to lovingly embrace things that will never leave
I have learnt that prudence and preservation have their place
but so do experimentation and curiosity
I have learnt to live independently of others
of their thoughts, their opinions and their presence
I have learnt to never underestimate the power of dreams, hard work and obsessive love
and to never overestimate arrogance, power and loud noises
I have learnt that darkness in the room is nothing to be feared
what is to be feared is the darkness in the mind
I have learnt to love passionately like no tomorrow
and never ever expect to be loved back
I have learnt to be receptive to the simple pleasures
to smiles, friends, music and rain
I have learnt to believe in myself beyond a shadow of a doubt
in my endless ability to work till I get absolutely anything I want.. in its purest form
I have learnt when to work hard and never give up
and when to let go and walk away
I have learnt when to make things happen
and when to go with the flow
I have learnt to listen and respect all opinions
but never to forget that its my life
I have learnt not to assume, judge or conclude
and just to listen, trust and explore

I have learnt to live my best life :)