Gifts..

She found her meaning and happiness in a polka dotted sea shell, while I searched for mine in the approaching waves of the ocean hoping they would spill me a secret. For her, an evening of enjoyment meant a couple of different flavored, cashew topped, king size ice creams, while I failed to find mine even in the most luxurious of homes surrounded by hordes of people. She found pride in the smallest of achievements - in catching a butterfly, flying a kite and in scaring the neighbour's son out of his wits. I couldn't find mine in numerous college degrees and the many bank accounts. Her world started at our doorstep ending near the main gate. For me, sky was the limit which so soon had started to seem so less.
She ran to him with careless abandon and flashing dimples as he entered through the door. She clung to her father who had just returned from work as if he were her long lost treasure. I wondered where I had lost my gift of reckless joyousness and free expression of love I was once loved for. I knew she had got it from me... and so did he. The dimples were his though. He looked at her like she was the most precious thing in the world. He got her a doll and a pretty pink frock. He always said I looked lovely in pink.
I waited. He never came back without something for me. This time, I got a kiss.. on my daughter's cheek.

Gargi

I have learnt..

I have learnt to remember that silence is "almost always" the best answer
and to recognize the situations which dont belong to "the almost always"
I have learnt not to try to stop things which want to run
and to lovingly embrace things that will never leave
I have learnt that prudence and preservation have their place
but so do experimentation and curiosity
I have learnt to live independently of others
of their thoughts, their opinions and their presence
I have learnt to never underestimate the power of dreams, hard work and obsessive love
and to never overestimate arrogance, power and loud noises
I have learnt that darkness in the room is nothing to be feared
what is to be feared is the darkness in the mind
I have learnt to love passionately like no tomorrow
and never ever expect to be loved back
I have learnt to be receptive to the simple pleasures
to smiles, friends, music and rain
I have learnt to believe in myself beyond a shadow of a doubt
in my endless ability to work till I get absolutely anything I want.. in its purest form
I have learnt when to work hard and never give up
and when to let go and walk away
I have learnt when to make things happen
and when to go with the flow
I have learnt to listen and respect all opinions
but never to forget that its my life
I have learnt not to assume, judge or conclude
and just to listen, trust and explore

I have learnt to live my best life :)

Gargi

Keeper of dreams.

Time cannot touch her
she is the keeper of dreams
Too late to take over
No man and no means

She has found the journey
to her only destination
Answers to her questions
a state beyond confusions

Her heart bears him no expectation
only a belief to the point of obsession
Her love is strong and blessed
with miracles beyond imagination

Love,
Gargi

Can you?

You can build a dam..
can you stop the waves?
You cannot stop the wind
you can just build caves
You can stop the war
can you bring in peace?
You can kill the woman
touch her soul you cannot.

You cannot stop the revolution
you can just lock them in
You can have her body
can you win her mind?
You can force their words
their loyalty you cannot
You can make him bleed
can you mar his spirit?

You can close your eyes
you cannot stop the sun
You can force her to abandon
but can you steal away her heart?
You can keep her out your eyes
you know you cannot from your thoughts..
You can cheat the world
can you your mind?

You can try but you will fail
the hearts have long since set sail

The Rice Mother

"The Rice Mother" - The book I was reading today. I dont remember any book after "Memoires of a geisha" that has evoked such emotions in me as this did. Every page made me sob. Every line gave me a new thought. I should have read this long long back. My friend gave this to me and I am so glad she did. Everything I am going to do or think hereon will in some mysterious way be connected to this book. Its amazing how life silently steers you towards hidden and forgotten treasures on an otherwise innocent saturday afternoon. The crisp, yellow pages soaked in my favorite "old book" scent has taken me away to a distant land. The cover picture of the lone woman on a sailing boat gazing with determination into an unknown future beautifully captures the story's essence.

The book is grand. You have to do a lot more than just read it to know it.

Oh and by the way, do make sure you have in your life, atleast one friend who is a true piscean. I have one and she always manages to push a bit of her piscean charm into my pretentious leonine life :)

Gargi.