Tuesday, May 8, 2007

There are somethings in life which you cannot understand, which you cannot change(though you would badly want to).. I dont have to tell you about the feeling when you are forced to leave someone you don't want to.. When you are forced to go away from someone you suddenly started liking and are having a desire to know them better. Its unfair i know. Its frustrating to me when some such thing happens. I want to tell so much to that person.. but there is no time, i want to share so many things with that person .. but i have to go away.. I feel helpless.. I feel hurt..
I feel like staying back.. but this journey is something that you cannot cancel, cannot postpone. Its the journey i have to take. I know i sound confused.. That's because i am confused.
I feel so helpless.. I always felt i could do anything i wanted, i could achieve anything i wanted.. but i was wrong. Life is powerful.. very very powerful I t can make you rather force you to things you would never otherwise have done. "That's life". I usually love life and living but today there is a certain something against this life.... I just hope it does not last

Love,
Gargi

6 comments:

krishna said...

It happens ... We want to know someone better for no reason sometime .. But even never get a chance ... When only some time is left and we are forced to leave lots of confusions raise in mind which often have no solutions ..

Sometimes it also happens that we never tell even if we want to and even when we get a chance too :(.. That's the worst part as far as i feel ...

but it's not the end .. Hope is the way to live ..

I don't know the incident which happened which made you say "hope this is not the end " ... but wanna say one thing ... It will not be the end ... Life is not short as we think ... Wish you best for everything ....

Aks said...

Though I am not very sure where this writing will lead to, as my writings usually don’t convince any one when I try it with such topics, being a bit of a pragmatic person that we all are. I hope you understand what I mean. Let me start my remarks just like you had started your previous blog.

Ever read any case study in which a character just like you and me is going through different kinds of experiences, interpreting them in their own ways. Some times confused, some times convinced, some times compromised, some times convicted.

Ever discussed your day to day feelings with other people sometimes with an intention to find a solution, but alas. Without reaching anywhere but just releasing your momentary mental-stress?

Ever wrote things about which even you are not sure. Things which while writing, even you know that you are manipulating sometimes. In a tone that you are explaining to others, but knowing well-within that you are not sure of it.

Ever watched a movie or a daily-soap where you find your favorite characters acting in weird ways which pleases you. Ever observed those few characters which you hate. The characters who with out letting you know are sinking into your brain in the very same intensity as the others labeled as good ones.

Ever helped a poor/ hungry person? Did you dig down as what made you do so?
A sense of responsibility towards this society? Or a sense of so called ‘Humanity’.
You did it because it gave you a momentary relief that yes you are doing good use of your life. That it made you feel good that you are better than many others who are not helping it. Ever tried to ask yourself the answer of “Why you should do it.”
Because at one or other place when you say that the society is responsible for this person’s present situation, you know that being a part of this society, you are responsible for it some where. That even you have a fare-share of that guilty consciousness which we ignore while moving forward in this curry-in-hurry life.

Our Grey cells play games. Games we don’t understand (At least few of us think so). Games which sometimes please us, confuse us, make us happy, and make us sad. All attributed to the complex organic chemical reactions happening well within this machine called human brain.

These games take us nowhere. Hence more than discussing the questions, what becomes important to us is “To find the suitable answers” which if don’t make us attend the ‘Nirvana’, but at least maintain our ‘Productivity’ through out our life.

So then we have reached to an end where we want to know how we can do that.

Ever been to any Psychologist? No offense, but if you have visited one, you know how beautifully they answer all these kind of day to day ups n downs we think about. Some times even better than our parents do. When I walked in simply to one of them in Apollo just to find what exactly these guys do, I ended up being mesmerized by their simple yet to-the-point answers and getting a list of great books from him when I asked him how he does it so well :)

Now it really does not mean that all of us are supposed to go and meet a P-guy for each of our problems. So then here are our choices.

Go and ask them :) or
Enhance our knowledge to a level when these frivolous questions stop troubling us and we are able to find their answers ourselves. When we even are able to counsel some one or
Stay lost in thoughts or
Just go and do something productive to us, as the greatest form of love is to “Love thyself.”

After all “It is our choices that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.”

Sadhana said...

Hi gargi,

How r u? hope u remember me :)

I got to read your blog while going through one of my friend's.

I'm happy to read this blog.You have written all my thoughts as it is.. :)

I too have faced such situations many times. Have thought that is the end. But fortunately that was not. With time u too will get rid of the feeling of knowing more about that person etc etc.. Its like the saying 'Out of sight is out of mind' :)

This is my experience.. But it takes time to get that feeling :)


Love,
Sadhana

Unknown said...

really nice one :-)

Unknown said...

gargi in a completely different shade of sensitivity!

knowing you, you ll never let any situation get better of you. yet, guess this line might help:
"If you doubt that you ll meet someone again or not, stop! YOU WILL! 'Coz life is too long, but we have so little time!"

taken from "Hum Tum", a line which i believe is very true! we have so little time to do all that we want to do that we just cannot help running into the same people again and again... and when the time is right, everything just automatically falls in place! you just cant explain life's mathematics, but it exists and is working its magic all the time!!!

Just wait till the equation solves itself! :-)

Pavan said...

the comments on your article are bigger than your article :P :P